Who do we want to be? It is so easy to get caught up in being busy, taking care of children, the home, school assignments, work, as well as a myriad of other activities that each of us, experiencing our unique vocational state in life, can add to the list. These can all be good things, but we can lose ourselves in our business and responsibilities as well as how we define ourselves, such that we slip into a state of survival mode or merely existing. One day can move into one week, into one month, into one year, and then we wake up one morning and wonder where the last ten years have gone!
We can fall into the trap of being defined by what we do instead of who we are and who God is calling us to be. We may have heard or be told at some point in our lives, “Don’t just sit there, do something.” God has another way of presenting us this statement: “Don’t just do something, sit there, and let me do something in you.” God has a plan for each one of us with the end result being eternal communion with him in heaven. Living a life of holiness and becoming saints is who God seeks each of us to be. We need to remind ourselves of this from time to time, by assessing where we are now and if we are listening to the guidance of God.
Our Gospel account from Matthew today gives us an opportunity to see holiness in action. Joseph has become aware that Mary, his betrothed, is with child and he is not the Father. Pass the Pepto Bismol please… Joseph, “a righteous man” follows the law, but is “unwilling to expose her to shame, decided to divorce her quietly” (Mt 1:19). Joseph’s life of righteousness pulls him to follow the law, yet he shows that discernment in matters of the dignity of the person is just as important. Joseph not only was unwilling to make Mary into a public spectacle but was also unwilling to allow the possibility of her to be stoned to death.
Joseph pondered the idea of divorcing her quietly. Before he made his final decision, Joseph slept on the matter, which is often a good course of action when weighing heavy issues or dealing with stressful conflict. How many times do we rush into decisions only to regret them later? Joseph receives God’s direction through the angel of the Lord in a dream.
When Joseph awoke in the morning, he did not dig in his heels feeling that he knew best, that he knew better than Gabriel, and return to his original decision. Joseph did not let fear or anxiety about the possible scenarios that were running through his mind regarding what others may say or think sway him, nor did the possible and real difficulties he could envision deter him.
Joseph trusted God. With confidence and assurance of who he was and what God called him to do, Joseph acted on the guidance he had received without hesitation.
St. Joseph is a model for us. When faced with decisions to make, we need to remember who we are, whose we are, and who we are called to be. We are children of God, and that means we belong to God who loves and cares for us. He has a plan and each thought, decision and action we follow through on is a step in diverting from or fulfilling that plan.
There are many elements in good discernment, gathering information, ponder the reasonable options, praying and seeking God’s guidance, slowing down to breathe and think, seeking guidance from a trusted family member or friend, reading, praying, meditating with the Bible, his creation, being open to Godincidents, or a good nap or early to bed. Joseph followed some of the above and had the humility to listen to God’s messenger and he granted him not only the guidance he sought but the support to fulfill the commission he received. God will do the same as we discern his direction too.
St. Joseph, pray for us!
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Painting: Closeup of Rembrandt’s “Dream of St. Joseph”
Spiritual Stepping Stones 